Spontaneous Outbursts

Falling inward

2011-12-16T22:27:00.000+03:30

There comes a moment when you surrender to the overpowering force of time.As you are struggling to deny the facts, in a split second, you find all efforts in vain.You begin to accept the fact that your ideals have already been faded under the shadow of reality. It is at that very moment of surrendering to the inevitable that all your past flashes back before your eyes.You start falling inward... little by little, piece by piece...

December 5th 2011

2011-12-05T20:20:00.000+03:30

December is here, maybe there is no need to mention how cold it is these days.It's kinda time for holding a warm cup of tea in both hands and leaning to the balcony's door and staring at the thought-provoking bare trees and fluffed up doves which have huddled together within the branches of the pine tree and philosophizing about life as a sip of tea being layered on your tongue.It can also be the time for enjoying the Tangerine and Persimmon (Date-plum).I don't konw but seemingly, I'm dealing with a sorts of ambivalent feelings like the astringent and bitter sweet taste of Date-plum.All I Know is that supposedly, in 20 days from now I'm gonna reach an inflection point in my life and it's gonna totally change my future and I don't have the least idea of how it's going to be like.Twenty days... and a bunch of tasks are left undone which I need to catch up on...

Nevertheless, one thing is crystal clear and that is that the weirdest, coldest and the most unexpected and breathtaking and challenging winter lies ahead.

سفره

2011-07-10T00:02:00.001+04:30

.امشب برای حلزون‌ها ضیافتی برپاست

.یک برگ کاهو می‌تواند آنقدر وسوسه انگیز باشد که حلزون‌های ریز و درشت را دور هم جمع کند

.اما این ضیافت را فردایی نیست

...فردا صبح، پیش از طلوع آفتاب، سفره به همراه میهمانان برچیده خواهد شد

2010-10-29T14:41:00.002+03:30

It's October 15th and It's twenty five degrees of Centigrade in Teheran and It's not even raining in here! but according to the www.isitraining.in, "Yes" It's raining in Berlin.La Radio chantefrance* is palying " Lettre à France" of Michel Polnareff .I've just finished reading the first published novel of Razieh Ansari "شبیه عطری در نسیم", her narrative style to me seemed like placing a series of integrated buttons which upon passing and pushing, they would put me in Teleporter or even a time travel machine.Just "Like A Perfume In The breeze" which unearths and lingers all your memories of specific time or location...

*Chante-France est LA radio de la région parisienne qui passe tous les meilleurs tubes français des années 80 à nos jours.(www.chantefrance.com)

(500) days of summer

2009-11-07T10:53:00.002+03:30

Immortal

2009-06-23T13:16:00.001+04:30

Her eyes are wide open, searching the space far beyond.
Suddenly her gaze fixes.
Her stare transcends limits to reach the eternity.

2009-06-22T12:56:00.002+04:30

With the question paper in his left hand, he said, he is ready to give the exam, he said, he would expect more from us, he said, you have made me desperate...
I could see the expression in his face that was asking us,"what's the matter with you?! havn't you see what was happened yesterday?! Don't you live here !! "
I was embarrassed, confused...
After maintaining the bewildering silence for few minutes, we began to choose a date for the exam and finally we compromised on a date almost one month later and then we signed the student list and left the class.

Reflections of a Skyline

2009-06-22T10:10:00.000+04:30

Reflections of a Skyline from Michael Tamman on Vimeo.

Annie Hall

2009-05-26T12:21:00.002+04:30

Alvy Singer: [narrating] After that it got pretty late, and we both had to go, but it was great seeing Annie again. I... I realized what a terrific person she was, and... and how much fun it was just knowing her; and I... I, I thought of that old joke, y'know, the, this... this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doc, uh, my brother's crazy; he thinks he's a chicken." And, uh, the doctor says, "Well, why don't you turn him in?" The guy says, "I would, but I need the eggs." Well, I guess that's pretty much now how I feel about relationships; y'know, they're totally irrational, and crazy, and absurd, and... but, uh, I guess we keep goin' through it because, uh, most of us... need the eggs.

numbness

2009-05-10T10:58:00.004+04:30

After adjusting the height of the chair by turning it 29 times clockwise, now It's much more cosy than the time I was atop my desk.Outside is cloudy.Apart from inventing new pasta recipes, being home alone for nearly one and a half week couldn't help me to get along with Thermodynamics of non-ideal solutions.Anyway, It's too tedious to talk about.For now listening to some musics seems quite an ideal solution to my situation and the most important of all, I think I've missed the time when the rain rattling windows, the time when the thunder seems never stop roaring.

So how is the weather like today ?

2009-05-07T16:22:00.003+04:30

INTRODUCTION : well I'm obviously trying to open up a conversation here.

METHOD :orally asking : so how is the weather like today?

DISCUSSION : or you may like this much better : how ya doing ?

SUGGESTION AND CONCLUSION : well maybe sometimes the applied method just don't work ! keep smiling !!

REFERENCE : out of Nowhere

Almost the time when cats fall in love

2009-03-16T21:18:00.001+03:30

Weird spring weather makes cats fall in love or may makes me feel the urge to write something here.I really don't know if this sensation has anything to do with the spring weather or the spanish song "Negra Sombra" which its melody seems perfectly suits my mood at this time or even something else.Whatever the cause be, It's an enjoyable feeling.

Vantage point

2009-02-27T11:25:00.004+03:30

Imagine a 10 story building somewhere in the middle of Valiasr st., now think about a room at the 9th stage which has a panoramic view to the north of Teheran and not just to the magnificent scenery of the Mt Tochal at the center and Mt Chinkalagh at the west but also to the all social life which goes on few meters above the street level.The life between the dish antennas,pigeon cages,coolers and some secluded corners with a rocking chair.All these things reminds me of something very similar(but not in the exact sense) and that's the vast biodiversity which exists in the tropical rainforests from the ground level which no ray of sun may never reach, to the peak of the trees which life appears in a completely different forms and you know, to see all these different kinds of life, you need a vantage point like a room at the 9th stage of 10 story building somewhere in the middle of Valiasr st. which has a panoramic view to the north of Teheran!

Nothing More, Nothing Less

2009-02-20T18:38:00.001+03:30

It's friday afternoon, nothing more, nothing less.

Dishwasher !

2009-01-29T12:33:00.000+03:30

How come listening to a Dishwasher while it's working can be so comforting to me !? you know, listening to all those water splashing, draining and bizzare sounds ! Now I guess the kitchen has become an ideal place for daydreaming and reading.Make some tea and choose a rather long programme of the machine then whilst the machine is taking care of the dishes, you can take care of your dreams !

Revolutionary Road

2009-01-28T13:24:00.002+03:30

John Givings: Hopeless emptiness. Now you've said it. Plenty of people are onto the emptiness, but it takes real guts to see the hopelessness.

... Phanerochaete chrysosporium ...

2009-01-19T13:44:00.002+03:30

Still i can't believe it, yesterday i made a decision which certainly is going to have a huge effect on my life.I just chose my thesis topic and well in cosequence i chose my thesis advisor after a great deal of thought , consideration and consulting with insiders ! - although most of you know but just to give you a grasp of what a tough decision it is to make, i can tell you that they say it's perhaps more important than choosing a spouse !- Now you know, the funny thing here is that I still have some difficulty in pronouncing the title of my thesis !

2009-01-17T10:32:00.001+03:30

You know, why I’m so badly in love with you is chemically complicated.

One of those cold January nights

2009-01-15T15:20:00.000+03:30

On one of those cold January nights, somewhere around the midnight he was leaning to the door of the balcony and his gaze was fixed somewhere beneath the halo of the blue lights or maybe somewhere in the shadows of the pine trees.He had held a mug with both of his hands.He stayed long enough till the window got fogged up by his breath.Now his focus had been gradually shifted from outside toward to the confining blurry window. He slowly brought the mug to his mouth and took a sip of the coffee and then started to draw her name by tracing his forefinger on fogged up window.Once again he could see outside through her name.He took the last sip out of the mug that had lost its warmth.It was one of those cold January nights.

Sideways

2009-01-07T19:23:00.000+03:30

In 4 days the exames will begin, and i know that i must run for the rest of the time but sometimes things don’t happen the way you thought they would.Well to make this situation perfect you may decide to go to a dentist and have a root canal therapy performed on a tooth which makes you swear a lot at the first night.But to your surprise it's not all that bad because non of those non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs gonna work out for you which makes you try to find an alternative to reduce that needling pain. So in the case of me which an unwatched film was left unattended for a long time because i couldn't feel comfortable enough to watch it once a bunch of assignments had remained on my desk, this time seemed to be the perfect moment to forget about surroundings and the pain and you know it worked. "Sideways" was better than any iso-butyl-propanoic-phenolic acids or Brufen like stuffs !

Maya: You know, can I ask you a personal question, Miles?
Miles Raymond: Sure.
Maya: Why are you so in to Pinot?
Miles Raymond: [laughs softly]
Maya: I mean, it's like a thing with you.
Miles Raymond: [continues laughing softly]
Miles Raymond: Uh, I don't know, I don't know. Um, it's a hard grape to grow, as you know. Right? It's uh, it's thin-skinned, temperamental, ripens early. It's, you know, it's not a survivor like Cabernet, which can just grow anywhere and uh, thrive even when it's neglected. No, Pinot needs constant care and attention. You know? And in fact it can only grow in these really specific, little, tucked away corners of the world. And, and only the most patient and nurturing of growers can do it, really. Only somebody who really takes the time to understand Pinot's potential can then coax it into its fullest expression. Then, I mean, oh its flavors, they're just the most haunting and brilliant and thrilling and subtle and... ancient on the planet.

Snowglobe

2008-12-18T09:31:00.001+03:30

In days like today, In these last days of autumn, in weather like today's weather, I can stand all day long in the balcony and watch the falling of early snow in Tehran.The way the snowflakes wandering and falling leisurely is really chilling me out.The two fluffed up doves have huddled together among the branches of the pine tree, maybe a little worry about the winter's harbingers but to me it's all like a huge Snowglobe which i just can't help watching and not drowning in thoughts of you.

Longing and nothing more

2008-11-15T13:02:00.005+03:30

It's almost the time for the Narcissuses in the little garden of my aunt to bloom.For five years i had been there at the time of blooming and Four out of five times i was all alone at this specific time of year.Here at this moment i have to confess that i'm really yearning for the scent of Narcissuses and the 20 min solitary walks alongside the boulevard in the cold mornings of Kerman's autumn.

Sometimes....

2008-11-10T23:04:00.002+03:30

Key word Evolution

2008-11-07T01:26:00.004+03:30

Sometimes once you take off, you never gonna know where you may land :
Fermentation---> oxidation----> endogenous electron accepter----> ethanol---> cellular respiration -----> ATP -----> electron donner-----> electron transport chain -----> thermodynamically favorable -----> emergent property -----> fractal geometry -----> emergence ----> Emergent algorithm and behavior -----> decentralized control -----> ant colony -----> autonomous unit -----> WWW -----> Spontaneous order -----> Proudhon's position was that freedom is prerequisite for spontaneous order to take place, rather than liberty being the result of spontaneous order. Hence his statement, liberty "is not the daughter but the mother of order." !!!

2008-11-01T13:58:00.004+03:30

Once during a rainy day, inside my room, on my desk.

Fading away

2008-10-17T22:28:00.006+03:30

Scattered thoughts pop up in my mind, vague ones, but they are gone a moment later.My head is down for most of the times though intermittently, I take a look, up head to see the path.The rhythmic heart beat which now bumps right inside my head is more dominant than the sound of the chilling wind.Inhaling is deep,exhaling is deep.The numbness is creeping up from my cold fingers.Pounding the path with my heavy steps,the cloudy thoughts fade away with each step.
It's all the numbness which is penetrating, crawling up.